Congrats to the Yankees on their renewed journey back to .500.

What was it last year?  “I just want to see the team win a few games, get back to .500, then we’ll take it from there”?  Something like that, right?  I feel like that had as much to do with the success last season as the song.

I am pleased that Girardi was clearly reading my comments from last night, as he is doing everything I wanted with the lineup (moving Giambi up and swapping Cano and Melky).

You’re welcome for the advice, Joe!

I just finished my second year of college, and got really mashed. This is about the only state which I’ll find watching this game acceptable. Bring it on, you lifeless bastards.

I wonder what the lowest BA for a player with an OPS over .800 was.

"I feel like that had as much to do with the success last season as the song.”

I ascribed any success last year to that young woman in the series of commercials for lust^h^h^h^hsome random product.

Ah, right.  I forgot about the mascot!  Bring her back!

I ascribed any success last year to that young woman in the series of commercials for lust^h^h^h^hsome random product.

Jeter probably tagged her at some point.
On a related note, he’s batting 3rd tonight.  Makes sense that a guy with one HR would bat 3rd for the Yankees these days.

Jonathan- The girl is back, the AL Eeast is now in the bag.
ENJOY THE SHOW!!!

I like crazy lineups, so let’s hope for the best.

Anything other than a hitless first three innings from Shields against the Yankees would be surprising.

It is amazing that the Red Sox lost again.

Right back to depressing outs.

I see the Yanks want to speed up the loss.

See ball, hit ball

So how many SB’s will Tampa rack up against Moose and his power-change?

Giambi cares, at least.

For those without TV coverage, Giambi just made a semi-excellent diving stop on a ball near the line.

Baseclogger will get the GC

Well, Moose is doing his part. Hopefully Giambi and Matsui can both hit solo homers. That’s about how the Yanks roll these days.

I guess the point about SB’s is moot if Moose never lets any of them reach first.  MOOOOOSE!

Hahaha...it’s be hilarious if the steroids were robbing Giambi of multiple GGs.

GC = gold cement-boots?

DaPuj- Don’t worry, Moose has trick to pick off baserunners. He’s too grizzled not to.

Hehe...okay, I have now officially gotten to the point where this is funny.

At least he went the other way!
See ball, hit ball

The predictability of their suckiness, that is.

Cano was trying to ground into a double play, but he forgot no one was on base.

Typical Yankee inning. Do something awesome with two outs, then Ensburg will suck.

The Yankees are gonna need the Rays to commit at least three errors today if they plan on winning.

It’s hilarious. The fates are doing everything they can to let the Yankees score, but you know they won’t.

It took awhile to post that - but come on, it’s not like it counts as a prediction.

It’s a good thing they’ve made Shields work through the first two innings. Oh wait: 26 pitches.

Shields gets the unstoppable Morgan Ensberg to make out and snuff out a powerful rally

Man, the pitching has mostly been nice to see.

Honestly, the pitching is why we have to be optimistic about the team when A-Rod comes back.

Melky sure has the arm for right field!

I’m surprised the Yankees have their one hit per game already.  Just felt like they’ve been good about maintaining the opponent’s no hit bid until deeper into the games.

Melky!

Good: Melky’s defense.
Bad: Jeter’s defense.
Ugly: Floyd’s base-running.

Starting AL Allstar CF, Melky Cabrera?

Hey, was it here that people mentioned Ankiel’s AMAZING throws from center? In any event, go to MLB.com - you have to see these throws. TWO in ONE game!

except for the part when Pettitte has been awful recently. But this season should mark the beginning of a swing in terms of pitching for the yanks, both rotation and BP. It’ll be nice to not have to rely on the offense all the time, although a bit more than they’ve been getting would be preferable.

Those regretting not making the Santana trade if we had Damon would be our CF and Matsui our LF

And Ensburg or Duncan would be the everyday first baseman.

Irv, do your thing.

Hi gents.

How is our favorite bunch of suckiest sucks who ever sucked doing?

Serling thinks Melky’s throw should get the Yankees going.  I think he’s been to too many Tony Roberts seminars or maybe he’s been jumping on the couch with Tom Crews

I feel like the Burgess Meredith character in Mice and Men saying tell me again what it’s like to score runs.

Brian- What did I miss?

nice to be done huh Matt? I finished on Sunday. Of course I’ve been working since then so I haven’t had much of a break, but work is a lot less stressful than finals and the weeks leading up to them.

Serling thinks Melky’s throw should get the Yankees going.

Yes, this season does seem to be stuck in a Twilight Zone, doesn’t it.

Brian- What did I miss?

Brian- I insist on the first pitch… though Damon is not winning a fan over.

Living on the black, by John Feinstein.

a week out

It would make sense that this team could figure out a way to make a week’s worth of outs on one pitch…

Hehe...true, true.

Serling thinks Melky’s throw should get the Yankees going.  I think he’s been to too many Tony Roberts seminars or maybe he’s been jumping on the couch with Tom Crews

Wasn’t he that ballplayer who was killed in a boating accident about 15 years ago?

How fucked up was it that at the time I was just happy Ojeda survived?

I mean, sure, I was sad Crews and that other dude died, but I mostly recall, “Phew, at least Ojeda didn’t die.”

Over/under of two for the Yankees tonight.  I’ll take the under.

What Yogi, the gambler, really said was its not over until its no longer under.

The Rays signed Kazmir to an extension. Wow, good on them.

They are freakin’ LOCKED UP for the near future. Good for them.

Bad for us

True. But hey, tough baseball games are fun, too - kinda.

I’ll take the over, Cano’s going to take this game into his hands and hit at least one bomb.

/hopeless optimism

They sure are going softly.

How is our favorite bunch of suckiest sucks who ever sucked doing?

To answer my own question: sucking.

It is amazing how predictable they are.

Two out hits that get stranded.

Matsui with a two-out double.  Seems about right.

Matsui- still married, still going strong

At least Hideki has a pulse.

Clay-- the only bad part is that I now need some kind of job to be accepted as a responsible adult. No, getting good grades in school isn’t enough. YES I AM A CASHIER BACK AWAY PEOPLE I AM A RESPONSIBLE ADULT… sigh…

Anyway, I find it really funny that the Yankees basically just sit on Shields’ change-up, because their collective bat speed has degraded so… a normal team looks for fastballs. The Yankees are praying to put that change-up into play.

At least Hideki has a pulse.

A halting, irregular pulse.

The Yankees score a run!  The Yankees score a run!

I hate when YES teases me by showing highlites of the Yankees hitting in a run from second with two outs.  Wait....

That’s the Cano I know.

It’s amazing when A run makes us so happy.

See ball, hit ball
(I REALLY don’t want to write that again tonight)

Brian- Really? Aren’t we always like that?

HR no, RBI single, close enough for me to take credit for.

2 out RBI single?  Really?  Huzzah.

Upton totally baffled by that 85 cheese from the Moose. MIND GAMES

I mean, runs make us happy, but not like THIS!

Moose=Loose

The Moose renasence continues.

Is the person who said he or she were going to his or her first Yankee game and was somewhat disappointed that Moose was pitching, but Moose ended up pitching well and the Yankees won here? 

Which is to say, Mooooose!

I won’t jinx it, but take a look at Moose’s current ERA.

Moosus Resurgens

MOOOOOOOOOOSE!  I love this so much.

Moose to Cano to Baseclogger for an out????
Did he throw to 2nd for the force out, was late, but Cano nailed the guy at 1st?

What is Moose’s current ERA?

Sub 4.00 ERA for Moose.  BC, want to update the Moose/Beckett comp?

Will Moose lower his ERA to under 4 tonight?  Will the Yankees score more than one run?  Will I jinx them all just by posing such questions?  Perhaps I should just holler..

MOOOOOOOSE

When was the last time the Yankees batted with a lead?

Villainx, that was me, and yes, I thoroughly enjoyed it.  He didn’t make me go “erp.”

I still do. :D

Ensy with a hit?
Molino without a DP?
Can I actually agree with a GULP Ozzieball move?

Moosus Excellenticus.

Molino’s sac bunt prowess!

I’ve been informed that my blood pressure is too low to give blood.  One would think that watching games like this would preclude that, but…

Damon, are YOU ready to step up?

Moose ERA = 3.99.  I said sub 4.00, and it is… just barely.

Dare we tempt fate AGAIN?

"Damon, are YOU ready to step up?”

Ah.... um.... no… he threw me a change-up.

WOW!

Dare we tempt it AGAIN!?!?

No, WJ, he is not.

what is this madness?

Two 2-out rbis in the same game?  Whoa.

Booby!

Joe’s crazy lineup? Worked like a charm.

Did someone finally tell the Yankee hitters they are allowed to hit with two outs with men on base?

I like this team much better than the one that came out last night.  Is Hank a PR genius?  Or am I just too willing to ascribe success to trivial matters?

What’s this...2 runs...how...brain....melting....

“beeeeeeeeeeeep” “system failure”

We need the return of that All I Need Is a Miracle clip.

I think it’s the Axe chick.  I really do.

Any of you guys mix vodka and orange soda? Really a spectacular concoction.

Not leadershippy, Derek.  Not leadershippy at all.

If Hank really wants to make a point about improving the team by force if necessary, whoever strikes out on 3 pitches with a guy on second should be taken out into centerfield and summarily executed.

Drink like an adult, for chrissakes.

Ghetto.

I’m just kidding.  Vodka mixes with pretty much everything okay.

What did they trade Navarro for again? Vazquez?

Only orange and cranberry juice in my view.  E.g., keep it away from vermouth.

The Moose renasence continues.

Disgustingly poor spelling for a journalist, or amazingly clever play on senescence?  You decide.

I stay as far away from Vodka as I can.

Some complicated equations suggest that I might see IPK pitch against the O’s next week.  I’m scared.

"Drink like an adult, for chrissakes.”

Boooo. I refuse to drink vodka without mixing it with something. Especially when it mixes well with… everything, pretty much.

Yeah.  It mixes especially well with....more vodka.

Navarro was in the Randy Johnson deal.

ANOTHER nice play by the future GG, Giambi!

Nice D there.

YM, the correct phrasing is “I’m a-scared.”

wow, Moose is rolling.

MooooOOOoooOOOooooOOOOoOoOse!!!!

/yodel

Moose=oh so very loose

Ah.  Thanks for the correctitude, Brian!

gameday showed Giambi getting to that ball almost over half-way to 2nd....its creepy

...they look to the left and they look to the right…

SEE BALL, HIT BALL!

What must I do to stop this mess?

Now that’s a good see ball, hit ball!!!!

.200!

Cano is batting .200!

Robby over .200, Moose under 4....  Hell hath frozen

Cano: no longer sucks?

We need to get a Cano .200 watch going.

Unfortunately, it seems that Cano and Melky simply switched bodies earlier this season.

Robbie is now hitting .200 on the nose.

Melky looks like he needs a day off. He seems to get burnt out very easily.

*sniff* I miss A-Rod…

Girls and college kids drink vodka.

Men drink gin.

Cano will double his BA by the end of the month.

Hey Clay . My Auntie and I were just gazing at those fine pics from Ecuador. When did you go there and dija eat any Guinea Pigs?

would that make me advanced for my age? G&Ts are my favorite drink.

Men drink gin beer.

Cano: no longer sucks?

But Cabrera now does.

I only gave one A this semester. You college kids are dumb.

Men drink moonshine and whiskey.

I did not. I think. I did eat a lot of unidentifiable processed meat that was similar to bologna, so it may have had guinea pig in it. I did eat the chicken that had been running around the house for a couple days though.

Thanks as well.

amen

MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOSE

This is so fucking awesome seeing Moose do so well.

Girls drink vodka?  I think not.

Men drink gin beer.

I would have thought that beer was a given.

WJ: what do you teach? (Agree on the college kids’ dumbnessitude, btw).

I am intrigued by Mr. Mussina’s ideas and would like to subscribe to his newsletter.

Moose is sofa king great.

"Men drink gin.”

Comments on martini-drinking: Don’t use Bombay Sapphire, it’s not made for martinis.  Gordon’s is good enough.  Don’t just shine light through the vermouth bottle into the gin - use 1:4 or so.  Don’t just put the gin in the freezer and pour. Shake ice through the drink - the water is needed for aroma/taste.  Don’t put exotically-stuffed olives in the drink - don’t use an olive at all if you can do without the nutrients.

Thanks guys.

Girls drink vodka mixed with hi c and shit like that. My only like Bushmills though, for some reason. I think she hates the Pope.

I have a serious man-crush on Moose.  It makes me happy to see him kick ass.

How much grizzle is on Moose’s chin?

er, the missing word there is wife.

Martini-making, rather.

MC has got me laughing hard.  Around the “double-fiber” bread I am eating.  Double the fiber of what, I wonder.

Many years ago, I got into the habit of drinking very dry Beefeater martinis straight up with a twist.  I have no idea why.

You know what? I never comment during his starts because I’m scared of jinxing him, but I’m risking it today: Mike Mussina is the fucking man. Never saw this kind of turnaround coming this season. I’m really happy to see him pitching well again.

Oooh, that’s a good tip about Bombay Sapphire, rilke!  I have a bottle and it just sits there, I can’t stand how it tastes in martinis.

Everyone knows a real martini has at least 1 part vermouth to 3 parts gin. This super dry martini fad is so phony. What did Winston Churchill say? Pour the gin, then bow in the direction of France.

A good use for BS is a gimlet with Rose’s lime juice.

I don’t mind bunting Molina because he is so awful.

Normally, it’d be dumb.

All I know is, I’m not drinking the pre-packaged girly mixed drinks. You know what I’m talking, that’s the wussy Smirnoff “Beer” available at your local bodega. I’m a step above that, I think.

I always considered Ensberg a poor man’s Betemit. I guess I had it backwards.

I have never seen anyone of either gender mix Hi-C with alcohol.  That’s just disgusting.

"A good use for BS is a gimlet with Rose’s lime juice.”

I’ve been drinking gimlets since reading _The Long Goodbye_ years ago - but doesn’t the lime kill the virtue of the expensive gin?

My wife always orders expensive ass bottles of wine at restaurants. Its made me hate dining out. I don’t need to spend a week’s salary on dinner. Christ.

The Long Goodbye? You mean the Big Sleep?

Wanna swap?  My wife can’t get through a glass of wine.

I’m a step above that, I think.

But you’re too damned drunk to be sure.

Foul?!

I have never seen anyone of either gender mix Hi-C with alcohol.  That’s just disgusting.

Ivy, I have.  And yes, it IS disgusting.

Vodka + orange or cranberry juice, or a martini are my preferred adult beverages.  A Heineken, Kilian’s, or Blue Moon will do in a pinch, as well.

Terry Lenox in _TLG_ drinks gimlets.

WJ- Is it some weird female sekrit I’m not privy to or can she just get the wine when you’re not at restaurants?  You pay much less markup that way.

She gets expensive wine retail too, she just doesn’t balk at paying markups. She always says the markups are worse on the cheap stuff.

I still say Damon’s ball was fair.

I have never seen anyone of either gender mix Hi-C with alcohol.  That’s just disgusting.

Never had jungle juice? lucky.

good beer is my preferred adult drink.

Expensive = not necessarily better, whether talking about wine or anything else.

I am stopping myself from going on my women-and-shoes rant.

But I’m talking SODA man, SODA, not JUICE. It totally changes the dynamics, man. /drunk guy explanation/

Maybe it’s gimlet time.

Maybe it’s iced tea time.  Though you guys might make me snarf it.

if you think it might be time then it is.

I disagree on the Bombay Saphatini. Splendid cocktail.
Woodford Reserve with one ice cuban is the fucking man. Bourbon.

Why is Pettite holding what appears to be a mini-beach ball?

Maybe it’s vodka + OJ time.

My girlfriend is all about malibu and any sort of juice.  That stuff is ridiculous, it doesn’t even taste alcoholic.

Now think about it, otf, I kind of wish I had eaten guinea pig.

I mean, why not?

Moose got squeezed in that AB.

I’d have let Moose face Floyd.

Floyd ain’t Manny.

I do love that Floyd is hitting .400.

Pull Moose?
He’s just getting started!

Well Clay just between you and I, I’m guilty of eating the daughter of an Italian policeman. I guess its not the same.

I feel a Navarro bloop RBI coming here…

Just got here - good convo, fellas - I think its Heineken time for me (preferred adult beverage).

For mixed drinks I like Bacardi-Diet Coke and Cranberry Vodkas.

I was close.

This move sure seems to be working out.

Here we go again.

What a lucky hit for Navarro. Ross will get Gross to ground into a DP.

This fucking blows.

Ohlendorf meant for that to happen.

Awesome.

That was so lucky.

Woo! That was a fast turn of Lady Fortune’s wheel.

Bullshit, TVH! Ohlendorf called that! Totally not luck.

Not at all.

All skill.

All.

Ross will get Gross to ground line into a DP.

Past a divin...JETER!!

To his left!!!

Matt, do you have the numbers for tomorrow’s lottery?  And/or stock market advice?